REAL TALK WITH DANIELLE - Quitting My Job to Travel the World
/The last week has been an absolute whirlwind! I have been working 6 days per week since I finished grad school. I cannot believe that I’m finally finished and can go travel the world for 6 months.
To dial this back even further, I went straight from high school to college to my master’s degree to working full-time. I have also spent every summer since I was 15 in an educational program, an internship, or working. Meaning...
I have never taken a break like this in my life!
...So what was it like to stop so suddenly? Honestly, I spent all of last week saying, “It hasn’t hit me that I’m leaving.” I was in my normal routine, and there was no reason for me to feel like a huge change was coming.
On Friday, I finished my full-time work at a mental health agency. Quitting this job didn’t feel so hard. I have been itching to start private practice since I received my mental health counseling license in the summer, and this job didn’t really have space for that. I was also at least one staff person removed from each of my clients, so I didn’t feel like I was building very therapeutic relationships. I was ready for the transition.
Saturday was the complete opposite. I finished my part-time work as a private voice and guitar teacher. This one hit hard. This work is actually much more aligned with what I hope to do long-term. All of my students showed up for my last day, which is not common in the world of private music lessons. I’ve been working with most of these students for about 3 years, and I was pretty overwhelmed. Most of my students are preteen girls, and it’s been so cool to see them develop as singers and as people. I also teach an 8-year-old boy, who walked in sulking with his head down because he didn’t want the lessons to end. I gave him a “see you later” hug to remind him I’m coming back. I gave them all letters with personalized gifts, and told them how much it meant to me to work with them. I will be back in the summer, but we talked through how they were feeling about the transition and how we could set them up to succeed. For me, it was a total success in terms of just how much I’ve learned from them and what I hope they’ve learned from me. But also a real bummer, because damn, I love teaching.
That night I played a 3-hour gig, so there wasn’t time to process all of these endings. By the time we finished, I felt that a huge weight had lifted, but I was so tired that I couldn’t think about it or talk about it. But having slept, here is how it feels:
I have been on this enormous trajectory from the time I went to high school. I went to a high school for the arts, and later on college for the arts. I realized I wanted to switch to mental health mid-way through college, and began my journey towards becoming a therapist in grad school. Following grad school, I worked for 2 years in order to get my license. This is the end of that period of time. For 8 years, it feels like I have been carrying a rock, which became a boulder, which became a mountain. It feels like overnight that mountain has vanished, but I’m still trying to carry it. I’m still trying because I don’t really know another way of being.
But that’s one of the points of going on a trip like this, right? Learning how to exist without any goals or responsibilities or expectations. It’s very “Eat, Pray, Love” of me, but, fuck it, who am I to say that shit won’t work? It feels directionless right now, but considering I have never been without a sense of direction, it seems important to give it a try. I’ve never had an opportunity like this to just be in the present moment, and I want to take full advantage of it.
So, yes, I’ve finally taken the big leap. I am unemployed. I said goodbye to my salary and benefits for the next 6 months so that I can focus on growing as a person.
I’ve received a lot of feedback from people who ask me whether this scares me. It does and it doesn’t. I’ve prepared really meticulously to make this work financially. (See my post: What’s The Cost of World Travel) I’m anxious about the idea of having $10,000 less than when I started, but come on, this experience is totally worth it! The thing that is scary for me is the lack of stability. I’ve been on a very well laid-out path for a long time and I’ve reached a precipice. Now that there is no clear next step, it’s almost as if I don’t know what to do with myself. I have this constant nagging voice in my head that tells me I should be doing something with myself. I told this to a very good friend who responded, “Yeah. You should just go travel the world!”
After this trip, I’m planning to start long-term work that I’m really passionate about. I want to buy a house. I WANT A DOG DAMMIT. But all of that will come. This middle point is the perfect opportunity to do something wild and carefree, and I plan to savor this opportunity for all its worth. I think this blog is a really helpful way for me to document how I’m managing through this newfound freedom that I’ve laid out for myself. Right now, I’m in shock at the lack of responsibility, but I’m eager to see how I will feel 2-, 4-, and 6-months from now. And I love having a place to document that and share it with others who may have plans to travel long-term.
If you’ve ever taken a long amount of time off from work, what was your experience? Have you ever thought about dropping everything to travel? What’s holding you back? Share in the comments below!
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